Ugh. Let me preface this with the fact that I’m still learning… A ‘student writer’, if you will. This question, ‘Where am I going?’ terrifies me in so many ways. I’m driving full-speed on the road of life, fearing the unknown, haunted by past failures following me, expecting future failures, unproductively going in circles, and terrified of success. Let’s face it, I’m a chicken, not playing chicken! If I’m being completely honest, it’s not that I can’t hightail it anywhere, but I’m choosing to NOT go anywhere at all. That feeling of stalling out is all my fault.

What journey or destination is so ‘unknown’ that I should fear it? While the trip may be new to me, there’s a good chance someone else has been down that road before… Heck, you can probably bet that one person following you on Twitter is going down it now! Engage those writers, mentors, and friends. Get their advice, and learn from them. You are not alone. Instead of fearing the unknown, I’m going to challenge myself to anticipate the future.

Maybe ‘Failure’ is a remote, unfriendly town I have to drive through on this journey. “Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.” ~ C. S. Lewis If I can take my mistakes and learn from them, are they really a failure? We all get caught up in keeping score, but I’m probably the only one focused on my personal score. Think about it, if I can’t move forward without looking back, I’ll get tripped up and fail to reach my goals.

Why do I have to be such a backseat driver? Who says I’ll make a wrong turn? I am my own worst navigator, because I get started on a trip, then get distracted, and never finish it. I blame my inability to focus and work hard on the swarm of family, work, and all that goes with it (not to mention social media). If I explored the possibility of completing my current work in progress, and set manageable, attainable objectives within my overall goal, then I might finish it.

Why do I travel on the same unproductive route over and over again? The long straightaway, turns into a curvy mess of highways and byways. Then, before I know it, everything begins to look familiar because I’ve gotten turned around. My biggest mistake is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result. If something isn’t working in my writing world (or family/work/etc. world), then I need to change my direction, or stop and get my bearings.

I should be looking forward to the state of success! It’s no secret that most people fear success as much as they fear failure, but why? In my case, the idea of publishing something worth reading sounds wonderful, but subconsciously I’m worried that everything else I write along this ride called life will be worthless. Expectations. They can make the most confident people shift into reverse. I need to toss those expectations out the window, focus on my bright future, and enjoy the wind blowing through my hair.

So, where am I going? I’m going wherever my words take me, and I’m not going to slow down, stall out, or make a u-turn. It may look like I’m in #CrazyTown on some days, but #WritingTown is my destination.